We all have different reasons why we prefer not to talk about money. A lot of people see it as taboo, and some people don’t think it’s necessary. Others believe talking about money means telling everyone how much you earn, or spend which they consider showing off.
However, this is not always the case for everyone. We got some people to share their opinion on this topic and here’s what they had to say:
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My partner and I have always talked about how much we earn. Pretty much from when we started dating, probably before. I also talk about it with some friends. But not much with family to avoid fostering a sense of entitlement. A lot of people I know are stuck with black tax and that’s something I would rather avoid.
People don’t talk enough about investments and debt leveraging and those are also very important.
Talking about money has helped my partner and I stay accountable and be responsible with our spending.
I think having open conversations about money helps open up opportunities for others, especially when you’re giving relevant information that has to do with how they can improve their finances.
For me, my brother knows how much I earn due to the fact that I invest with him. Some of my close friends are also aware of my financial strength. I don’t have colleagues but I think talking about how much you earn with them will be a tricky conversation to have.
In my last relationship, my partner and I were very transparent about our finances and while some term it as ‘see finish’, it was beyond that for us.
Taboo ke? I like to talk about money o. Although, I don’t really think people should disclose how much they earn.
I think it’s a human thing: if I tell people how much I earn or how much I’m worth, they start to have expectations of me and I don’t want to be bound by those expectations.
I do think that the important money conversations to have don’t need to be too exact. e.g if my close friend tells me how much they earn or they give me an estimate, I would like them to literally “show me the way” by guiding me through opportunities to earn better. The wahala here is again people will rely on others to drag them into that income bracket and it doesn’t work like that.
Other reasons people don’t like to talk about money
- Fear of being judged: No one enjoys being pitied because of their financial situation so they prefer to avoid conversations that reveal that side of their life.
For instance, if someone gets invited to a party and can’t afford to show up, they will rather lie that they are too sick to make it than state the fact that they aren’t in a good space to afford to spend money.
- They grew up that way: A lot of people grow up with parents that don’t talk about money when the children are around. This affects their relationship with money and makes it difficult for them to have these conversations when they are older.
It’s important for children to build a savings culture from their childhood and even learn about investing. Not everything is taught in school, so life would be a lot easier if we learned from family.
- People simply do not know how to talk about money: With all the financial terms and lingo that surround money, it’s easier to just avoid the topic altogether. People are worried about saying the wrong things and using the wrong words because no one has made personal finance easy to understand.
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- They are self-conscious about their money habits: No one is perfect, especially when it comes to money. We all have our red flags and are afraid to let them show, so we avoid doing anything about them or talking about money in general.
Other times it’s really because you’re either doing well financially or not so good, so you think it’s better to be secretive about your finances.
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Benefits of talking about money
There’s a plus side to having conversations about money instead of being silent about it. Honestly, it’s a win-win situation for everyone who decides to be more involved in these conversations both for now and their financial future.
Here are some reasons why you should talk about money with people you trust.
- It helps you get your finances in shape.
- You get a broader perspective on pricing and negotiation, especially when it comes to salaries, rent, and purchases. This way, you don’t get cheated.
- It helps you and those around you actively work towards financial goals and achieve them.
- It can reduce the risk of financial infidelity between you and your partner.
- It kills the awkwardness that comes with having such conversations with family and friends.
How to have conversations about money
Just start: It’s so important to start having money conversations at whatever point you are in life.
Whether it’s talking to your parents, partner, friends, or colleagues you can learn more when you have conversations with people around you.
Join online conversations: Look to be a part of online conversations where people are talking about personal finance. Conversations about savings, investments, rent, emergency funds, career, money, and mental health, etc.
Social media is a powerful tool. You will never know what useful information you can gain from talking with people online that can help you make better money decisions. You can start with Clubhouse, Twitter, Instagram, or by simply listening to some fun podcasts about money.
Create money dates: A money date is relevant for you on a personal level and for your relationship.
Asides from other conversations you have with your partner, you can both schedule a day in your week or month to talk about your finances. Transparency in a relationship is so important, especially when it comes to money. It helps build a stronger connection. It also helps you tick off those difficult conversations about debt, joint accounts, financial goals, and a lot more.
Surround yourself with people you share similar values with: Check your friends and the people you hang out with, do you share the same values? It’s easier to talk about money with people that have similar goals to you. In terms of budgeting, planning for your future, educations, family, etc. When you’re surrounded by these people, you are able to bounce ideas with one another with ease.
It takes time and habit to open up about money but what matters is that you start. There’s so much we can learn from each other when we have these money conversations.
Are there other reasons why you don’t like to talk about money? Let’s talk about it in the comments.